Thursday, February 18, 2010

"Share three classic movie moments that have, in some shape or form, made you buy things, do things, think things that perhaps you shouldn't have."

First of all, this is not easy. Secondly, this isn't from a specific moment, but you'll get over it. And thirdly, this may be all I'm able to give. We'll see.......

"Annie Hall"

I adored how Diane Keaton was dressed and absolutely positively did my damnedest to emulate her look. A mistake? Something I shouldn't have done? I'm sure there were days that I never should have left the house, but I've had a lifetime of those. There was an outfit that I shouldn't have done....an ensemble in preparation for my cousin's wedding that never really looked good, though not for lack of effort. Using that "Annie Hall" look as a springboard, I made it my goal to put together a monotone beige outfit. Think Richard Gere in "American Gigolo" (though this story took place pre- "AG"). Not a suit per se, but coat and slacks, all of linen (or linenesque), as well as shirt and tie. I began with pants that I'd found earlier and had never worn. Not linen, but very linen-like. They had huge back pockets that stuck out. (I know there's a word for what they were, but I don't know it). These pants were the first mistake. Plain and simple, they were goofy. I did learn a valuable lesson with this outfit; Don't scrimp when you shouldn't scrimp. What I'd wanted was a linen suit, but it was probably too expensive for me. The coat I found was from Falconnable and it had a label on the pocket by the lapel. (I recall a few people touching it and making a comment; Visible names on labels weren't common yet, I guess). It was unlined. It was okay, but not what I'd really wanted. I found a lovely linen shirt with a sweet, small rounded button-down collar. The last piece was the tie. For this, I searched everywhere. Of course, I shlepped my outfit around as if it were my wedding and my gown! The tie I ended up with wasn't right: Crinkly cotton, its hem cut diagonally. In theory it should've worked, but never really did. It still hangs in my closet. It's never been worn since that wedding. And there were shoes, which I don't know why I bought. Here I splurged, went to Louis...LOUIS! Back then, it was the Barney's of Boston (don't know if it still is). I got sandals, well, again, I'm unsure of what their name might be....beautiful men's dress shoes with cut outs. I thought them very waspy and fabulous, perfect for a summer wedding at a restaurant. They hurt my feet something awful and...I still can't believe I did this, I threw them out. What an asshole. I don't have a photo of myself at that wedding, though my aunt does. Strangely enough, it's a photo of me and Dad. I hated him, I can't believe we were standing close enough to even be in the same shot. Below is a shot of me at that time. You can see the "Annie Hall" influence...kind of.

My outfit, though not at all what I'd hoped it would be, was high couture when compared with this hideous short-lived marriage. My cousin, a very smart woman, married a man that had been her client. She was doing social work in a prison and he was an inmate. It was all very strange, most of us were quite confused about everything that was going down. They lived out-state so we rarely crossed paths, but at some point, we did. A mutual friend of my cousin's and mine had a party. Cousin & husband attended, along with the husband's friend, who had been in prison as well and was now the paramour of said mutual friend. Now I must tell you....cousin's husband was butt ugly. I mean, he looked a little like John Belushi, but John was an adonis in comparison. This is part of what made the whole shiddach so confusing. (My cousin was & is an attractive woman). Mutual friend's ex-con boyfriend? Magnificent. Like Clint Walker in his prime. Yes, I was intimidated. So, we're all at this party and then it's done. Days later, mutual friend tells me that my cousin asked her a question. Seems cousin's troll husband (oops, forgot to mention, he didn't have quite a full set of teeth) told my cousin that I had kissed him on the lips at that party. My cousin asked mutual friend if she thought I would do such a thing. When I heard this, my head exploded. That my cousin, who I'd always been close with, would even wonder whether or not I'd #1: kiss HER husband and more importantly #2:kiss a troll, sent me into orbit. It destroyed our relationship for many years and even though we communicate now, it bears no resemblance to the relationship we'd had. Fast forward a bit when mutual friend and I are talking about this whole sordid story & mutual friend tells me that Clint told her that cousin's husband had been very active sexually in prison, though a known fag basher on the outside. Clint also told mutual friend that he would've liked to have slept with me.

No, I did not.

You lie down with dogs, you get up with fleas.


Please, we're all ears!