STARTLING!

Do you know who she is?

RIPPED FROM THE HEADLINES

Well, actually it was torn from today's Op-Ed page.

I say it's unfortunate that the writer's mother's womb 

was operative and that her genes live on.

On the Town

MJ snuck away for a few days, but the paps snapped her with Mr. Peenee 

(who claims to be in New Orleans) as he pushed her towards the ladies lounge. 

Honey, if you throw 'em back, you have to remember to hook up the catheter. 

Blaspheming the Dead

Poor dear, she died recently.

I can't help it, I adore this photo.

MEN AND FISH

NORMADESMOND WET DREAM REALIZED

BETTE MIDLER WILL BE INDUCTING LAURA NYRO

 INTO ROCK AND ROLL HAME OF FAME.

TO BE TELEVISED ON HBO, MAY 5, 2012

SIGH.

THE MOUNT RUSHMORE OF MUSIC

Marilyn might consider the cheek implants that Barry has. 

They'd certainly lift his mood, visually. 

What strikes me is what a dedicated entertainer Manilow is.

TIPS FROM THE DOCENT

"YOU'LL ENJOY ART MORE THOROUGHLY IF YOU STAND BACK A FEW FEET."

"HONEY, THIS WON'T HURT A BIT"

I'VE HAD THREE OF THESE AND ALWAYS IMPRESSED ON THE 

TECHNICIANS THAT MY BEING KNOCKED OUT WASN'T UP FOR DEBATE.

SHOCKING PERSONAL NEWS

MY HEAD IN THE MUD FRIEND JUST BOUGHT 

AN iPAD AND IS NOW, FINALLY ON LINE.

WATCH OUT.

Home THEATAH

Now this is the way to do it.

Jinx Falkenburg's TV room. 

MRS. PATMORE'S GEFILTE FISH

YOU PROBABLY HEARD THAT SHIRLEY WILL BE PLAYING CORA'S MOTHER ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DOWNTON ABBEY. BUT DID YOU HAPPEN TO CATCH THIS CHARACTER'S NAME?

(MARTHA LEVINSON!!!!)

Mr.Carson: Sir, shall I light the shabbos candles now or when I serve the port?

Earl of Grantham: (Shrugs) Let's say we ask Lady Grantham....when my mother is not in the room.

PLEASE, COMMENT AWAY

YESTERDAY'S BIRTHDAYS

MY GOD, YOU CAN BE TOO RICH AND TOO THIN.

DICK CLARK'S MALIBU HOUSE FOR SALE

BEDROCK. HIDEOUS.